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[Leanan]

This is where I'll post my fics on this forum. If I find any readers here, that is. I've posted all of them to the Scroll of Colors and will continue to do so. Some can also be found on the fanfiction.net website. I won't be posting Holt fanfiction here - it's all canon characters (with some what-ifs, original characters, crossovers and genderblenders thrown in for good measure)

This first post will contain an index of the stories posted in this topic. (This because I am working on several stories at the same time and sometimes chapters of one story will turn up among chapters of another one).

[Leanan]

Here's my latest fanfic.

Beyond Mere Flight


Kahvi cursed as she walked, but they were silent curses now, in her mind only, she didn’t have breath to waste.

Tyldak! What an arrogant stupid utterly brainless troll-hugging maggot of a cave bat!

They’d been travelling – how long, Kahvi couldn’t say. A very long time. Many turns of the seasons. They’d been lovemates to each other, and Kahvi had to admit it had been pleasant. Then, just yesterday, Kahvi had sensed the sudden appearance of the Palace just over the next ridge of hills. Felt it, like she hadn’t felt it in ages. It was close… just an hour’s flight on Tyldak’s wings.

And the arrogant fool… he’d told her he wasn’t coming with her. He’d told her he didn’t know who was Master of the Palace, and feared it would be Winnowill, or someone like her. He wasn’t going to risk it, the yellow-livered coward! And when Kahvi tried to convince him of how important the Palace was to her, to her whole tribe – the stubborn idiot simply flew away and left her there, standing in the snow shouting curses at him.

Kahvi grimaced. An hour’s flight on his wings it would have been, but a day’s walk now or more, and most of it uphill. And she had to hurry, couldn’t rest enough, she didn’t know how long the Palace would stay in place.

She wondered if Rayek was still Master of it.

She thought about what she’d do if she met him. It involved a sharp spear in a very painful part of his anatomy. Perhaps a knife and one quick movement, too – she wouldn’t kill him, just make him wish he was dead. There had to be some things even a healer wouldn’t be able to fix.

Kahvi reached a turn on the path, and a new vista opened before her. She saw the Palace now, still far ahead, and sparkling. It called to her, she could feel its pull with her whole body. She forgot thoughts of Tyldak, thoughts of Rayek. This was more important than love or hate. This was the Palace.

It sang in her blood, it whispered in her bones. It looked – Kahvi had to admit it didn’t look like much. Like a piece of troll jewelry, like a pink-tinted glacier, like a crystal found in a dark cave, brought to sunlight. It sparkled too much. It was pretty, and Kahvi had little use for pretty things.

However, it was the Palace, and how it looked didn’t matter.

Kahvi walked faster now, the path turned downhill. The last steps she ran, yelling a battle cry.

And the wall of the Palace opened, like she had known it would. A figure stood there, silhouetted in light. Others surrounded him, among them Timmain the High One, and Cutter, for whom Kahvi still found some fond feelings in her stone-cold heart.

“Welcome home, Kahvi of the Go-Backs.” The light shifted, and Kahvi could see this being was not Rayek. To her surprise, she felt a slight disappointment.
“Where’s Rayek?” She asked.
“Far from here. Was it him you sought?” The Master of the Palace asked him. Kahvi recalled his name had been Skywise, perhaps it still was. It had all been so long ago.

“I sought the Palace, but if he had been here, I’d have had some sharp words and cold steel for him.” Kahvi answered. In the edge of her vision she caught Cutter smiling at her, looking far too smug for his own good. Perhaps Nightfall had told him? That’d be embarrassing. Better not think of that now. Other fish to fry.
“I see. Why do you seek the Palace?” Skywise asked her.
“Wouldn’t you? Anyways, what are you doing here? There’s nothing interesting in this part of the world, and the humans are particularly annoying.” Kahvi countered his question. She decided Masters of the Palace, all of them, were extremely frustrating to talk to.
“We came here for you. And Tyldak. We found you in the Scroll of Colors.”
Kahvi groaned. “Can’t you steer this thing any better? Tyldak didn’t want to come. So I had to walk a whole day and night. You could have landed a bit closer.” She complained.
Skywise shook his head. “I could have landed anywhere, but I chose to land here. I wanted to give you and Tyldak the choice of coming to us, or staying away.”
Kahvi started yelling at him: “Choices and freedom – that’s wolfrider talk, and rotten! Thanks to you, my lovemate has flown off! Another one! Next one I take to my furs won’t be able to fly anywhere on anything, I’ll make sure of that!”
Skywise grinned, and Kahvi remembered he was indeed one of those smug guys who thought that if a female talked to them about furs, that meant she was interested in sharing those with them.

Not in a million years. I’m done with Masters of the Palace.

Kahvi promised herself, as Skywise spoke:
“You’ve come to the wrong place for that, Kahvi. This is the Palace. We are all about flying, here.”
A thought seemed to occur in his oh-so-exalted brain.
“Would you like to try steering the Palace?”
Kahvi stared at him. Steer the Palace. Her eyes lit up. He might be annoying as dung on a boot sole, but this was the Palace. This was what generations of Go-Backs had lived, fought and died for. The mere idea that she could steer it, like a stag, like a Giant Hawk…

“I sure would.” Kahvi smiled. “Lead the way.”
Skywise led her to a room that seemed to be only half there – the outer wall of the Palace had been made transparent, even the floor was transparent, and she could see the snow, crushed tight under the weight of the Palace.
“Touch the wall and think of a place.” Skywise instructed her.
Kahvi stared at him in disbelief. Was that all there was to it?
**That is all there is to it, child. Your touch and your will. But only because we allow it, so don’t expect the impossible.** This was Timmain, sending to her. Kahvi growled, and touched the wall.

And beheld the Frozen Mountains. There was no Go-Back Lodge where she remembered it, and many of the peaks had changed, the glaciers had moved… and yet this was her home. Here, she’d been chief.

“Where are all my people? I didn’t see Go-Backs in that big hall.” Kahvi asked Skywise.
“Some of them are with Ember, the rest are with Venka. Venka started a quest to find you.”
“Hmph. And you thought you’d show her who’s better and find me before she does?” Kahvi asked in a surly voice.
“Nothing of the kind. I was going to let Venka find you herself – but then she met Lehrigen.”
“Who’s that?”
“A human who claimed he had killed you. Venka believed him, because he showed your braids for evidence. Braids I note you aren’t wearing anymore.”

Kahvi sighed. Of course she couldn’t wear the braids, not after a human had managed to cut them off her head. Even after the hair had grown back she’d not braided it again. She felt she’d lost her right to be chief when she lost that battle.
“That stupid trophy-gatherer? A fighter like him, I’d have expected him to make sure I was really dead. I’m sure he really did think he killed me. But I’m not that easy to kill. Got an ugly scar, though.”
“If you like I can ask Leetah…” Skywise began.
“No healers! I’ve never needed healers and I’m not going to start needing healers now!”
“All right, all right. Where shall we go next? I was thinking we could go to Venka and show her you’re alive.”
“Venka is with the Go-Backs?” Kahvi asked.
“Yes.”
“Then I shall have to braid my hair first.” Kahvi stated.
“Because you’re going to be chief again?” Skywise asked. He wasn’t sure what he thought of this, but decided not to comment.
“No. Because me braiding Venka’s hair has no meaning unless I wear the braids myself when I do it.” Kahvi explained to him.
Skywise didn’t argue. “Do you want to see something else first, then? Have you ever wondered what the surface of Child Moon looks like up close?” He offered, a Master of the Palace eager to entertain his guest, however blunt her manners might be.
“Only daft stargazers wonder about useless things like that.” Kahvi told him. She sat on a bench in the room, at least she thought it was a bench, but it was so soft it felt more like a bed. Typical of soft-bellied wolfriders and useless Masters of the Palace, she thought. Only a cloudhead like Skywise would put a bed in a steering room. Probably for when he was too lazy to walk to his actual bedroom. Or when he brought maidens over to let them have a go at steering the Palace.

Hang on…

There was something wrong with that thought. He’d brought her here.
“Has everyone here tried steering the Palace?” She asked casually, while she started braiding her hair.
“No. Most of them are too worried that they’d do it wrong, or simply not interested in that kind of thing. Some even say being in this room while the Palace moves through time and space makes them feel queasy.” Skywise explained.
“Why did you ask me if I wanted to try it?” Kahvi asked him.
“Because you’ve done so much for the sake of the Palace. I thought you deserved it.”
“And who are you to decide if I deserve the birthright of my ancestors?” Kahvi stood up and stared at him, her fists ready to punch that smug smile off his face.
Skywise spread his arms. “They call me Master of the Palace. They call Sunstream and Kimo that, too. If you want, you can be Master of the Palace too. Timmain will teach you everything you need to know. Sunstream will teach you a bunch of things no sane elf in my opinion needs to know. And I’ll teach you some things about the stars that Sunstream finds very boring and not important at all.”

Kahvi looked him in the eyes with pure hatred. “You dare… you dare offer me the Palace as a gift, as if it could be owned? You dare call yourself Master, here in this place? Do you know how many lives have ended for the sake of this piece of magic stone?”

Skywise didn’t blink. He stared her back.

And the Spirits came out from the walls. Go-Backs Kahvi had known, Go-Backs Kahvi had never met. Skot… Vaya… they were all here. Some she hadn’t known had died, but they seemed quite content to be here.
**Kahvi… Kahvi… Kahvi… finally you have come!**
A child spirit, so tiny it could have fitted on the palm of her hand, danced all around her like a preserver in the air, only faster, fast as thought. Its mother chided it.
**Come here, my pearl. I know, I know, she’s the one we followed to our deaths… but all is well now… she is here. All will be well now.**
There were tears in Kahvi’s eyes. She knew the mother. She’d been a warrior. She’d never given birth to a baby. She’d died in the great Palace War, fighting alongside Kahvi and Cutter… and their tribes.

They were all here. The warriors, and the ones who weren’t warriors. Tiny spirits of unborn children, tall spirits of warriors who’d lived in Two-Spear’s time…

And then they melted back into the walls. But not before Vaya had whispered something into Kahvi’s ear. Her spirit did the whispering gesture, but the voice came in locked sending:
**You deserve the best, mother. And you shall have it. Whether you want it or not.**

Kahvi looked at her as she too was gone. And then she turned to Skywise:
“I don’t know what you’ve done… but you look like you’re guilty of something. Those were spirits, yes, and they may call you Master – but I don’t, and I won’t!” She declared.

And he just kept looking her in the eyes. With a smile on his face as if he knew a secret.

Kahvi stared back, growling under her breath.

And then…

She felt as if she was falling into his eyes, falling through him, into a world full of stars. She felt as if snow had turned hot, as if winter had turned into summer overnight, as if she’d been thrown off a stag and had landed on a cloud. She felt lost among thoughts so alien to her own, she could not understand them at all. She saw a light, and reached for it, and it was a star, it was a name, and the name was…

**Fahr?**

[Sweetwater]

ooo wow! You are such a good writer! i loved reading this! please post more!

[Leanan]

(stargazer made some lovely illustrations for this story. They can be viewed on the Scroll of Colors, Fan Art and Fan Fiction subforum, this story's topic.)

Beyond Mere Flight, Chapter two

Skywise stared at Kahvi, shocked to the core.

She’d just sent him his soulname. And his mind was filling with her deepest secrets. Kahvi was cold as the arctic night, and yet warm also, burning inside with a hidden fire, an intensity of living that many wolfriders would envy. She grabbed life by the vitals, she feared nothing and no one. She reminded him of Bearclaw a lot.

There was no doubt of it. They were Recognized. Just like he and Tam… only this time, it would be different.

He’d never thought it would be like this. The spirits had been whispering hints for several days, telling him something wonderful was about to happen, telling him it started with finding Kahvi. He’d had no idea what they meant. Timmain had been talking to him about Recognitions, and he still hadn’t caught the hint. He’d wondered instead if he was going to Recognize Timmain. That, he wouldn’t have objected to so much… he already had a feeling Timmain knew his soulname… she was a High One. And Kahvi was…

Roya. His soul’s mate. He became dimly aware that at the moment Kahvi was spouting curses at him.

“…you numb-witted maggot, you troll-poking coward! What magic have you worked on me?” She demanded angrily.

“Kahvi… it is indeed magic, but it is no magic of mine. It is Recognition.” Skywise explained.
“To the fire pit with your Recognition! I want none of it!” Kahvi stated, pushed him aside and stormed out of the room.

Skywise sat on the bed. He was still overwhelmed by the vastness of it all. Kahvi was so many times his elder… Two-Spear’s daughter… a mother many times over… and yet, her soul was young and alive, always searching for new experiences. Skywise had often wondered what Recognition would give him. He’d spoken proudly against it, thought he’d need something special, ‘high ones coming back and bringing the stars with them’… but he’d been relying on the thought that it wouldn’t happen yet, not anytime soon, that he’d have time to prepare for it. Sometimes he’d wondered whom he’d Recognize if it wasn’t Timmain, but it had never occurred to him that the person he Recognized would not be happy about the Recognition. Skywise had always been popular among females. He’d expected himself to be the one less pleased with the Recognition. So many maidens had whispered to his ear how they’d love to Recognize him… he hadn’t given much thought to the reality, that there were also maidens who didn’t think he was all that special.

He should have known. He’d seen what Tam had suffered with Leetah. He’d witnessed the unlikely match of Tyldak and Dewshine, with all its consequences. Sometimes, Recognition just didn’t care how the people it brought together felt about the whole thing.

But what was Kahvi’s problem? He’d sensed in her a longing to be loved, to belong somewhere. There was something between her and Cutter, Skywise knew. Was Kahvi disappointed because he wasn’t Cutter?

Skywise stood up and went to find Timmain. She always helped when he had a problem.


--

Kahvi walked back into the bigger chambers of the Palace. To his amazement, there was a celebration going on. The wolfriders and Sun Folk were in progress of feasting on fresh meat and dreamberries. Kahvi found Cutter, sitting on a bench with Leetah. “What is this all about?” She demanded.
Cutter stared at her in surprise. “I didn’t expect to see you back so soon. Did it go wrong?”
Kahvi growled. “Did what go wrong? Make some sense, wolf-chief!”
“Your Recognition of course. Leetah told me.” Cutter explained.
Kahvi looked just about ready to kill someone. “What business is that of yours, or Leetah’s?” She snarled, turning to face Cutter’s lifemate.
Leetah stood up. “I’m a healer. I can’t help it if I sense a Recognition. The Palace itself strengthens my healer senses. To my inner eyes, you and Skywise glow with magic.”
Kahvi spat on the Palace floor. “Magic! Rotten, troll-poking magic! I liked this Palace a lot better when it was just a story! Why can’t magic just leave me alone?”

Kahvi became aware that everyone was staring at her. “Well, what’s wrong with you lot? Go on with your stupid celebration. And give me some of that fried meat, I’m hungry.”

A Sun Villager maiden gave Kahvi some meat on a plate. Kahvi grabbed the meat by the bones and started eating with her hands. The maiden giggled.
“What’s so funny?” Kahvi demanded.
“You eat like Chot. Do all Go-Backs eat with their hands?” she asked.
“Of course, how else would we eat? Hey, this is good meat. So you know Chot? What’s the old dungbrain been up to lately? Steal any more Palaces? Trick any more chiefs?”
The maiden giggled again, then looked a bit sad.
“We haven’t seen him for a while. I think he’s in the Forevergreen, somewhere. Chot was fun to have around. But not as fun as Skywise. You’re a lucky maiden.” The girl’s eyes looked slightly misty, as if she was about to cry.

Kahvi snorted and walked away. She found a seat covered with furs and sat down, chewing on the meat, while her mind was chewing on other things. This whole Recognition business didn’t suit her at all. The Go-Back way was better. No mind-magic to mess things up. And Skywise wasn’t what she’d choose for a mate. He was a dreamer. Kahvi liked practical people. Like Cutter. Why couldn’t it have been him instead? She looked towards him and saw him and Leetah looking each other in the eyes. It disgusted her. So soppy after all these years.

Suddenly Kahvi heard a voice speak in his mind. **It was hard for Mother and Father at first. Mother didn’t want to accept father. But she did in the end. Otherwise I wouldn’t have been born. Recognition is important. A soul yearns to be born through you, Kahvi. Perhaps more than one soul.** She looked around, and saw a young, golden-haired male looking intently at her. With him was a strange-looking female, and two babies playing on a blanket on the floor. She recalled a child, curious and smiling, with the same wavy locks. **Suntop?** She asked, shocked by the change in him.

**It is Sunstream now. Welcome back, Kahvi.** He sent. He spoke to the curly-haired female with the funny ears, and she looked at Kahvi and smiled. Kahvi ignored the smile and began chewing the meat again.

Chapter 3

Skywise looked up at Timmain, as if his heart would break from the sight of her. He wondered once again why Timmain insisted on wearing no clothes. It was not that he objected. Quite the reverse. Her beauty had been hard to ignore, of late. All that talk of Recognition had led him to have ideas above his station. He looked away, to the flickering Scroll of Colors.

Suddenly he realized he was crying. And then Timmain was there, holding him. Her hair smelled of wolf fur more than elf hair. **Timmain… Timmain…** he sent, while sobbing, feeling like a child now.

Timmain turned his head to face her golden eyes. **Skywise… why do you cry?** She asked, and he realized she really did not know, had never known, never guessed his feelings for her. She was, he knew, his distant ancestor, and of course she would see all the wolfriders as her children.

**Is this what I gave up Timmorn’s blood forever for? Kahvi despises me, despises our Recognition. Even now I can feel her anger in a distant part of my mind. She curses me for many things.** Skywise said, but he had to close his eyes from the intensity of Timmain’s gaze. It was the truth, but it was only half the truth.

**How do you feel about Kahvi?** Timmain’s question, deceptively simple, opened a vista inside him he’d rather not consider at all. **She is not what I expected.**

Timmain shook her head, and her snow-white hair shimmered in the colorful light from the Scroll. **Recognition is never what we expect, Skywise.**
**But you are a High One!** He objected. **Surely it is with in your power… we always say that Recognition is the High Ones’ will.** He tried to explain a thought, half a thought, a feeling, a profound belief he found torn from its roots.
**And so it is. We designed it, and we set it loose in the world, to give our children what they needed to survive. We could not call it back even if we were all here in the Palace today. It is in your blood. It is part of who you are.** Timmain explained.
**And do High Ones Recognize?**

Timmain shook her head. **We called it something else. It didn’t bring us children, not when we travelled through space.**

Skywise shook his head, copying her gesture. It was still strange to him to see Timmain in the Scroll as a hairless, cone-headed creature. Somehow he’d always known which one was Timmain, though others said they all looked alike. **So the Firstborns were not born of Recognition?**

Timmain smiled, and looked even more beautiful. **They were born of High Ones’ will. Who can say what is the difference?**

Skywise sighed. **And what is the High One’s will, tonight? Should I court Kahvi, like Cutter courted Leetah? Should I force her to stay with me, like Tyldak kept Dewshine as his pet in Blue Mountain? She is Kahvi, Timmain! It’d be as futile as trying to keep Bearclaw from gambling with trolls! There is no telling Kahvi what she should do, ever! Anyone that tries to she just walks over. She knows my soulname. She’ll speak it aloud, if she thinks that will win her something.**

**You fear her.** It was not a question.

**I am in terror of her, Timmain! Her soul… it is the Daystar. Leetah would say, what a pretty way to describe a female. Leetah would completely miss the point. In Kahvi’s light there is no space for the stars. They fade out into the sky’s blueness.** Skywise withdrew from Timmain’s arms, looked down at his hands. “She called me a daft stargazer. I didn’t mind at the time. But her being is so different from mine… the core of her soul is fire.” He said this aloud.

**The core of every star is fire, Skywise. You would have felt the same, had it been Vurdah, had it been Foxfur, had it been Aroree. All stars are the Daystar when seen up close. Have you forgotten already?**

Skywise shivered. The hearts of the stars… he had seen the hearts of the stars, through the Palace wall. They were boiling cauldrons of liquid flame. He had been torn between fascination and terror.

**I have not forgotten. But what am I, then?**

“Master of the Palace.” Timmain spoke aloud. This was something she rarely did nowadays, and Skywise was startled. Somehow, between the two of them, sending had always flowed easier. It was spoken words, now, that had more weight between them, as if everything had been reversed.

“And… is that all?” Skywise asked.

Timmain laughed. **Is a drop of water the ocean? Is a tree the forest? If she is the Daystar, then you are the night between stars – and it might look like you are opposites, but what embraces the Daystar closer than planets in orbit is this filament of nothingness, the night between the stars.**

Skywise made a wry face. “I think I liked ‘daft stargazer’ better.”

**You know better than to fish for compliments from me, young friend. I say what is on my heart. Fighting Recognition – do it, if you must. You shall both be miserable. What you fear is the loss of your freedom, but tell me, don’t you think Kahvi of all people would appreciate freedom as something you could both give each other? If you argued your case well, you could be done with this all in one night.**

Skywise sighed again. **So we thought it would go with Dewshine and Tyldak. But it was not the end of it. Recognition is not an end, it is a beginning, always. I dread what is about to begin. I do not think I could let her walk away, not knowing if I’d ever see my child. I missed Yun’s childhood. I would rather not miss my chance to be a real father again.**

Timmain placed a hand on his shoulder. **I understand. But this is a knot you’ll have to untangle yourself. You want things that pull you in different directions. You will need to choose a path, and stick to it. And Kahvi will need to choose hers. Give her a little time. And do not tell her her soulname, yet.**

Skywise stared at Timmain. Tell her her soulname… did Timmain mean… Kahvi did not know?

Timmain smiled, stood up, and walked away. Behind Skywise, the Scroll of Colors was showing the Frozen Mountains being torn in two by Rayek’s misuse of the Palace’s powers. The image flickered, and became just dancing flames. The Lights of the Frozen Lands… thrown over a sky of stars. Or perhaps… simply the firepit in the lodge, the night Yun was sired. Skywise would have known, had he looked that way. He didn’t.

[Wildfire]

Wow. Unexpected, but very interesting! I look forward to reading the rest